from Stanislaw Warda: "if we haven't done something"

If we haven't done something we think we should do at the right time, it comes back to us with a much stronger desire. No matter what; it could be a plan to buy a house, upgrade a car, or graduate from college. This specific regret is interesting because we did not do something that came to us not immediately, but sometimes after some time and in a place where we did not expect it. (This type of desire can be so strong that it may even be illogical.)

We usually do not understand that this specific sadness that affected us after some time, when an event happened, bothered people close to us, for example our parents, more than we.

My last trip to Poland was related to this matter. At first glance it was the same as the others; visiting family, friends and visiting the cemetery. However, this time I felt I had to do something more. To others it may seem stupid or even macabre, but I felt I had to do it. When I visited the cemetery and stood at my parents' grave, I pulled aside the covers I received at the end of my studies, which imitated a diploma during the ceremony, and said that I had done it. I did it. (I did it especially for my mother, because I still remember the joy on her face when she told her friend that I would soon get into college. She was so happy with me, so proud.)

 

It may not have been the time or school you wanted me to graduate from, but I did it and I regret not doing it on time. I remember that time when you were very proud when you told a family friend that your son got into university. To get there, I had to pass a placement test because there were several candidates for one position. I remember how you looked, back then. I saw how happy you were. It was the kind of happiness that all parents and older people should feel. This happiness gives strength and motivation to act. It's a kind of confirmation that your life path was right. I also remember what your face looked like when I announced that I was leaving the university. You didn't say anything.

People need time to understand some thoughts. My understanding of what I did to you was that my daughter dropped out of college and there was nothing I could do, only this sadness.

Later, when I thought about my youthful stupidity, the kind of stupidity that ignores everything that’s important, telling you that you don’t need an education and that without it you think you're a genius, I gave up. 

I would like someone, especially young people, to read this post and know how important it is to finish education and have a diploma in proper time. I want them to show their parents their diploma when they are still among us, and everyone would be happy about it.